Hi

Hi
(this is me)... in 1966-ish

Saturday, December 12, 2009

'Oh Happy Day'

And that isn't sarcasm either. For the last month (approximately), for some reason, I've been happier in my skin than I have ever been. I have always wanted to feel like this and now I do and I am really enjoying it. (although I look for lightning to strike occasionally and cross the street only at the green signal... just in case).

I think a few things are contributing to this:
  • I have grown up and know who I am and understand my place in society and think that it is good. It took me a lot of years to do this. (I ain't finished yet) I have had visits from old friends who lived in HK many years ago. I saw them in November for the first time in 20 years for one and 13 years for others. Speaking with them and reliving old stories really showed me how far I have come (grown) and I have a real appreciation for this perspective.
  • I have been exercising regularly for almost a year and the endorphins are keeping me 'up', positive rather than negative.
  • For the first time in my life I am really listening to the good things people say about me - and I believe them.
  • I am finding out who my friends really are and have started making great new friends. (and letting go of friendships that don't work) I recently learned a really important lesson about friends: I was always hurt in the past because friends would leave Hong Kong. I held on to them as if they were an extension of myself. I realized recently (after 28 years in Hong Kong) that I did this because I was trying to create an extended 'family'. Some are still friends, some are not. Recently I've realized that I don't need to hold on for dear life anymore - I have a family and I'm not needy. I can be friends with people who come and go into Hong Kong because I know I already have my family in place. I've grown up. (I did come to HK way too early - so it's taken me a long while to learn this)
  • I regularly go to a really great church now and for the first time in my life - I like going. I feel more positive and more accepted, more hopeful and more grounded... and way more grateful. I have never felt this way about going to church - I truthfully never liked it before. This is a great relief to me that I finally feel this - I never thought I would.
  • I really know I am married to a really great guy. I can live with him not being as groovy as me and he seems to be able to live with my inability to do math and my great ability to create artistic clutter. I am stunned every day that he goes out of his way to listen to me and works hard to make me happy. I hope he feels that I am doing the same.
  • My kids are doing well and are kind, thoughtful people. I never dreamed when I was young that I would have the incredible family I have.
  • I have much less angst and way more lightheartedness when it comes to food and eating. I still am not dieting well but because of being more relaxed about it and eating a pretty good diet overall, I am 1 pound over my weight when I returned from Utah. I had gotten up to 8-9 lbs over, but now I'm back down. I will lose this and be more serious one day soon, but my coasting at the moment is okay.
I have done some travel recently  - well since my last entry.... I've been to Phuket, Bangkok, Amsterdam, Copenhagen, back to SC and just last week - to Xiamen, China and to visit my friend in a smaller town (Quanzhou) near Xiamen.
During this time, I've continued going to the gym and have exercised even when travelling. Pat bought me an early Christmas present - a Life-fitness Cross Trainer. It is very nice. My left heel has acted up (Plantar Faciitis) and it becamse worse from doing the Cross Trainer so much (45-60 min each time) so I've had to give it a rest (and have done the bike at the club). BUT, I'm better now and am back on it for 35 min per session. My left knee has hurt a lot lately.... but what do you do? Just exercise anyway.
Am preparing for Christmas and am really grateful for the way I feel right now.

:-)
the picture at right is of me and an old friend, Anthony, whom we have known for 26 years. (Part of our Hong Kong 'family'). This picture was taken at our Thanksgiving dinner recently.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Yay! August is over . . . . . . . . !

I like the fun things you can do in summer, BBQ's, being on a boat, swimming, becoming blonder for free. . I love how I feel when swimming at night and sitting on the beach with a slight chill.  . . but I hate the heat. Always have, always will (probably). It gets to me.
I'm glad August is over. Sorry if that's your birthday month - I missed it by 2 days myself.

I have thoroughly enjoyed exercising at the gym in the American Club out in Tai Tam (30 min drive out in the country) It's not crowded, the machines are great and the view is really out of this world. I love their elipticals there because when I'm trying to cool down, they let me go as slow as I want without beeping and pausing every two seconds. Sometimes I put the machine up to Maximum - level 25 - so I can work my butt harder (it's like climbing a mountain). The machines in Tai Tam allow me to go slow at that level and I really love that. The ones at the American's Club's Central gym (downtown), beep and pause and just generally over-react to everything....and it's so annoying.
so yes, I'm still exercising regularly and I actually get excited about going to the gym. I have built up great workout playlists and am always updating new songs. I consider it dancing and my hardest part of the workout is when a song like 'Boom Boom Pow' or 'One' (by Creed) comes on and I keep the beat. I can do that now.... but usually wait until at least 30 min warm up time first.

About a week after my last post here, I was at the gym with Pat and his mom and I asked him if he'd take a picture of me on my eliptical so I could post it here and show the harbour view (and me).  I thought beforehand that it may be a bad idea to do that - to mess with the fantasies I have in my head about how athletic I must look when I workout. But I have risen above a lot of things and was sure it would be okay. I have even gotten to the point now that I don't feel like an outsider in the gym. I had considered working out for years in that gym but never did because I thought that all the people in great shape would wonder what someone in my shape is doing in there. Since going regularly though, I am at home there and feel that I totally belong. I made friends with the staff (of course) and now recognize the regulars (who are not all in great shape).
*But*that*didn't*prepare*me*for*the*horror*of*seeing*myself*in*this*picture*
YIKES!
It knocked me for a loop for about a week and I could only go back to the gym by being in complete denial about how I really look. I am apparently a great fantasizer.
As far as eating goes, I'm ok but still not seriously dieting. I'm kind of playing games. I think I may have mentioned before how I'd gotten into the habit of eating ice cream (specifically Moose Tracks) when I was in SC this summer. Then when returning to HK and having sort of an "I hate Hong Kong" meltdown, I started back up with Cookies & Cream. Since I have been exercising 4-5 times per week (absolute truth and I'm delighted about that), I haven't gained more weight. I'm standing at the same 4-6 lbs above my weight when returning from Utah. That ain't great but it shows the power of exercise for me. I do eat healthy food every day....I've added other junk too, there's the problem - that's the stuff I pay attention to.
I did make one positive move recently after sitting down and thinking about my comittment here: I am saying absolutely NO to ice cream. I won't have it anymore and haven't for a week now. It's a slippery invitation into that world where I eat any and everything and I won't do this.
That's a plus.
I also ordered more clothes for workouts and they've arrived. They're all a size smaller and they are in great colors. I must say though that it's really hard to wear clothes that fit me and are not loose. They don't hide stuff, but I do believe they look better on me.
It's not easy - but I'm not having ice cream over it.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Becky's *A*M*A*Z*I*N*G 'Success-Only' journey.

On my computer screen is a quote I cut out from my Dr. Phil calendar a year or so ago. (love you Dr. Phil) I taped it to my screen so I will always remember it. It says,

"This will not be a 'Success Only' journey."


But I keep expecting it to be success only. How annoying that it is not. That I am not.


I've gained 6 lbs since returning from Utah.... well, since returning from SC on July 10th, really. I've been in a real slump and I don't know when it'll end. (maybe when I quit paying it so much attention??)

Once again - I'm amazed at how quickly I am able to jump right back into hopeless and helpless-mode. For a week now, I've been a quivering bowl of self-pity. (red, cherry flavored). I have some valid stuff that I'm worrying over right now (Zoe has tick fever, Kevin's in Uganda, Bonnie leaves in a week to travel with boyfriend and I'll only see her for a handful of days until Christmas, I hate Hong Kong at the moment, and I can't help but notice - I'm still fat. . . .)


I can't allow weight gain.


I have always put eating properly in an unattainable category. (Actually, I do eat proper, good quality, healthy food... but when stressed, I add ice cream...liberally). I engage in 'hell yes' and 'hell no' eating and they're both wrong. I have always done that and I think I'll probably always have a propensity for it.

Right along with the indulgences and consequent weight gain comes self-consciousness. I've been avoiding mirrors and showing disgust towards myself. I already know that those behaviours lead me right to the land of no-turning-back weight gain and powerlessness.

Those bad feelings are a VERY BIG part of this game.

I don't know what I want to say about this subject right now - but I am aware of it, and that usually helps.
I remember
how I felt
in this picture
taken of me
at Fitness Ridge
in March.
Gotta
get
back
there.


Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Back in HK, Back on Track

I'm back in HK after 5 weeks in the states (+ Jamaica). I'm happy that although my eating did go awry here and there while I travelled, I exercised as often as I could. I even joined a gym in my little home town and went as regularly as possible. I worked one on one with Carroll, the owner of the gym 2-3 times per week. He taught me a lot! (and now he's my buddy). Even more impressive (to me, at least), I went to the gym while in Jamaica and while at Myrtle Beach later on. I worked hard to get to the gym in MB. It was at the hotel where my nieces and nephews were staying, there was no gym at my little condo 3 miles away.
I think that's the thing that has saved me...'EXERCISE' I am the same weight I was when I left HK but feel great. I have truly made the change that I always talked about and can now say I am an exerciser. I'm proud of that fact - exercise is a part of my daily life now. :-)


I have been working hard on the eliptical (or as Carroll calls it, the Cross trainer). It's non-impact and doesn't hurt me at all. Even if I get on it and at the beginning I'm hurting (not from exercise but because I woke up hurting), the pain is gone by the time I've worked for 5-8 minutes. Having knee surgeries twice in 7 months did suck BUT it taught me that I have to exercise because without it, I hurt. As I've said before, exercises releases the pain I have - and it goes.


While in SC, I did the eliptical on average 4 times per week and each time I did it a minimum of 45 min. My goal is to do it 1 hour 5 x per week with weight training 2-3 times. Yesterday was Monday (almost certainly making today Tuesday). I went to the American Club in Tai Tam and did 55 min on the eliptical, keeping my HR up to 145 most of that time. I did go up to level 15 and maintained that for a while..... it was nice. My goal is to be able to do level 20 without making the machine pause. :-) I also did some weight training, ball work, 50 sit-ups and a few mat exercises while there. Carroll asked me to give him a list of the machines they have at my gym and he'd work out a program for me. That is super cool. I asked for the list yesterday and will collect it today.


I'm vaguely doing South Beach phase 2. I need to get less vague about it because I want to lose some more weight. I have been more precise today.... and that is surely up to me.


There were a couple.... a few times in SC when I bought 'Moose Tracks' ice cream...... man that stuff is good. A couple of times I had chocolate parties. (only I was invited). I also ate at Chick-fil-A on average 3 times per week. (chick-fil-a on a whole wheat bun w/ coleslaw and unsweet iced tea). Man that was *G*O*O*D*.


My old feelings of guilt and disgust came back each time but I have learned the lesson that if I sit around feeling bad about occasional bad choices, it empowers them and blows the occasional indulgences WAY out of ProPOrtiOn. (It's like being on stage and experiencing love from everyone in the audience.... but way back in the back is ONE person who doesn't like you or your performance.... and you forget all the love and positive attention so you can focus on that ONE BAD THING). That's how I stayed stuck in that cycle before. I am not going to play that game.

Yay Becky.

Here's a picture of me with my sister's son in law, Donnie. I'm posting this picture because it shows changes in my face that remind me of how I used to look.


I'm getting my face back. (uh... nice chest Donnie)

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Roller-Coastering

I am riding roller coasters.....
The one in my mind - the emotions and drama that I experience (because I've always done that kind of thing - I'm that way). Then there's the real roller coaster that I am on. Health wise.


The torn meniscus was not a torn meniscus. It looked like it on the MRI and the report said it was, but it wasn't. That seems like good news but it's not to me. A torn meniscus can be trimmed and fixed and not give you a lot of problems afterwards. The problem I have is osteoarthritis - which we knew that I have (me and Dr. Wu), but it's worse than we thought. It was so 'messy' inside my knee that it looked like a meniscus torn in several places. It was swelling, loose cartilage, and stuff. The boot camp spa wasn't good for my knees. (but it was excellent for my mind so I can't say that I regret going there - I don't)

Dr. Wu drilled tiny holes into the bone where the arthritis had worn away the cushioning in my knees. He drilled to the marrow (yuck) which allows blood to flow in that area which regenerates cartilage. That's good but he said the cartilage that will grow from it will not be good quality. He said it will be pourous and grainy (not smooth like what God first put in there during assembly)... but it's better than nothing - which is the amount of cartilage I have in a few areas in that left knee. I remember walking the West Canyon hike in Utah while at the spa and on the way out it hurt somewhat but at the end of the walk - truly it hurt so much I could hardly get to the end. I remember thinking to myself that it felt like my knee bones were rubbing together. I actually thought that very thought. That is exactly what was happening.
Dr. Wu, (who is a good guy), said that we can put lubricants in the knee joint which will help and he spoke of a new procedure called 'PRP' (Protein Rich Plasma) where you take your own blood, do something scientific (?) with it.... then put it in your knee area... it makes the cartilage regenerate - maybe.
The hospital was nice - went to a different one this time, a more fancy one, but when I arrived home after my one night stay, I had a staph infection on my upper thigh where they had given me a shot for pain. (I had abou 4-5 pain shots all over - it hurt a LOT after surgery). After only one day at home I had to drive to the Dr.'s office (near my home - my regular GP's) and get antibiotics. They drew a line around the red, hot part (a little bigger than the palm of my hand) and said come back the next day if it get's larger. It got a little larger so I went back and they added one more antibiotic. So... now, after simultaneously completing 2 courses of antibiotics, all that's left is a hard, slightly painful lump. Since I'm leaving in less than a week for the states - and for Jamaica (man) where I'll attend Christy's wedding, I'll be watching it to make sure it's 100% uninfected. This really scared me because staph infections can be deadly.

So.... that is the physical roller coaster.

Mentally, I have been somewhat depressed after leaving the hospital. I was blown away that at 48 (49 in July, so who am I kidding?) I have advanced osteoarthritis in my knees. I wasted not one second before yelling at myself and criticising me. I felt old, hopeless and ashamed at what I have done to myself. I've been over 200 lbs almost continuously since about 1994 or 5. That ruins your joints. For a few days I felt no compassion for me and really wondered what kind of exercise I will even be capable of in the future (I love the elliptical and hiking). I was also afraid of the staph infection.

The mental roller coaster:

*Last July - daddy died :-(
* tore my ACL and meniscus in right knee while doing a self defense class in Atlanta
* had surgery and was depressed for a week while at home afterwards
* had several epiphanys about my life and my attitudes which were handicapping me - vowed to change :-)
* developed a strong resolve to lose weight after the 1st surgery :-)
* gained more weight :-(
* brought my resolve back out of the closet, started dieting - lost 16 lbs from Feb - mid-March :-)
* Went to the boot camp spa for a month :-)
* hurt all over (of course), was hit by one affliction after another - but stayed the course
* lost another 16lbs and am a changed person :-)
* still in pain, went to doc, had MRI
* had surgery but discovered it was a worse problem than thought :-(
* developed staph infection (scared me)
* knee is now improving and have been swimming and back in gym a little. :-)
* but am worried about long term prognosis.
* I also have two painful shoulders that are keeping me awake at night - rotator cuff problems.
* Feeling kind of old but am absolutely realizing that these wasteful, negative thoughts are a bigger handicap than arthritis.

So that's it.
I look at people who live within horrible situations. Cancer, being in an accident and living with handicaps or terrible scars, long term illnesses. Losing everything in one way or another... sometimes these people dig down deep and find a resolve and the strength to stay positive, hopeful and keep going on. The whole world admires these people (some end up on Oprah, the rest just keep living their day to day lives).
Some people who are afflicted with these situations become alcoholics, prescription drug addicts, fearful of living - or worse.... whiners who bring down everyone around them and make people stay away from them.
After realizing that I cannot continue with negative thoughts, It has occured to me lately - that I can be one or the other. I will become one or the other type of person no matter what I do. In fact, right now I have to choose where I want to stay. If I want to be the one who soldiers on, I cannot continue criticising myself. I have to let me off the hook (just like I would do for my kids or for anybody else that I love a lot). I can't continue punishing myself for past sins (real or perceived) like I have always done in the past.
So.....
I will do whatever I can right now and I'll be content with it. I won't sit around feeling old and unable. I will not entertain whiney negative thoughts. I will not take this personally - the universe is NOT aginst me. I will keep on losing weight, doing Yoga, swimming, doing the elliptical and whatever I can manage. I will not stop.
So there.

Arthur Ashe, when learning that he was dying of AIDS said, If I were to say, "God, why me?" about the bad things, then I should have said, "God, why me?" about the good things that happened in my life.
What a fine human he was. I want to be a human like that.
.
.
by the way, I've lost another 6 lbs since my return home from Utah. Haven't weighed this little since 2000.
Go Becky.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Feeling good

I've been back in HK just over a week now and I'm very happy that my weight is the same since leaving Fitness Ridge. We had visitors for a week and many meals out - so that's great! They were so fun to have around. (but that's another story) Look at my picture from Saturday - my chin isn't the main point of the picture anymore..... thank God. (though it is still there)

The MRI said that I have a torn meniscus... so I need surgery. That's annoying beyond belief and even though I suspected it, it still sent me over the edge for about 2 full days. I was mad at everything but mostly mad at myself for ever being overweight in the first place - which compromised my knees. I really was furious and I could hardly even talk.... but after a day I realized that what I was doing was living an old pattern. I critisize myself to death (relentlessly), feel really bad, then crawl back into victim mode, providing a great excuse to console myself with whatever is available. (dare I name it Scarlett? Is it food?). Actually, I'm impressed that I recognized it. I am on track now and honestly, anyone could've torn a meniscus on the huge red rock I tried to step up onto (when I tore it in Utah).... so I'm booked to have the surgery in a week, on the 12th. I'll confirm it as soon as our insurance agrees to pay. At least this is more simple than last October's surgery with a torn ACL and meniscus. I anticipate a full recovery.

We have had delighful weather since I returned and that is a very pleasant surprise. It's been nice and cool - but sunny! 22-26 celcius w/ 40 - 75% humidity. (70 - 78 degrees F ? I guess).

Pat and I went to the gym last Saturday but my knee really suffered afterwards. I've done Yoga twice (not hard on my knees) and have walked twice. My knee hurts somewhat but not bad. (and who cares, they'll fix it next week).

I have been wearing my heart-rate monitor and I'm forcing myself to work harder. Walking the hill I've always walked is just the easiest thing now. I walked pretty fast tonight and was able to keep my heart rate up but in 45 min I burned only 280 cals.....
....anway, I'm not being black & white here, I'm happy to be doing what I am doing, I do have a torn meniscus afterall. But I feel encouraged that the walk is easier - so much easier for me and that when I did get out of breath, I recovered quickly. That's what it's all about. (well that and the hokey-pokey)

I have a problem I didn't anticipate. My clothes are embarrassingly too big. Even the clothes that were tight before I left are so silly looking on me now. I need to dig deeper into my closet, I know my size is there. I will also get rid of these 'too-large-clothes', as soon as I have a chance to go through my closet.

Believe it or not, I'm going to the states AGAIN at the end of this month (May 30th). My niece is getting married in Jamaica on June 6th and I will not miss that. My sister's also turning 50 on 7/4 so I'm joining her and the gang in Myrtle Beach. I'll be back in Hong Kong on July 10th and plan to stay put until Christmas. I have been looking for a gym to join for the duration of my stay there in my little hometown. I plan on asking them to work out a deal for me. I think they will, the economy is bad, right?
So... I'm on the South Beach diet, only having one cup of coffee a day, staying away from snacks and feeling good in my skin.
Bout time.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Back in Hong Kong

Bonnie and her buddy, Ramona learning to make banana pudding (which I taught how to make but did not partake)

It's nice to be back home. (can't believe I'm saying that about HK).

I've been back almost 48 hours. I landed Friday morning at 5:30am. By 1:30 I already had an appt. to see Dr. Wu about my knee that has hurt like.. a hurting knee. I did an MRI right after I saw him but don't know the results yet.. Should know by Monday, hope it's not bad but I get the feeling it's a torn meniscus. (however you spell that).
Last week at Bonnie's (Mon-Wed) we were exhausted, especially the 'me' part of we. Here's Bonnie and Motzie, her rabbit. (short for Mozzarella)During that time with all of it's running around and staying up til all hours of the night, I did manage to walk Hudson one day w/ Bonnie for an hour and a half (in 108 degree heat... no kidding) and the next day I walked 2 and a half miles while Bonnie worked with her Rugby team.



Now it's Saturday night. This morning I started the day (early) with 30 minutes of Yoga. Yoga is hard.... but so effective. Later today we had lunch with Kevin and Pat's sister & husband who are in town. I packed my gym bag just in case we had a chance to go the American Club for exercise. We found time and I worked really hard. 10 min on the bike for warmup, then 30 minutes on the eliptical with my heart rate UP most of that time. Then a few of the weight machines ending with some stretching and 50 sit-ups. It felt great to work hard again. I think I've developed a love for that hard work. My knee hurts now which is a bummer because it didn't hurt much at all before I exercised.
Really?

Am I really going to have to have surgery on this knee too? No word yet but it seems unjust that last October my right knee went under the knife and now my left knee is not doing well. Thank God I only have 2 legs, otherwise you KNOW that a 3rd one would be acting up 6 months from now.
We have 4 visitors arriving tomorrow for a week. My niece, Jenny and her new husband Aaron. + Jenny's friend (?) and my nephew, Eric. I'm very happy they're coming. :-)
Anyway, I'm exercising and eating well.... and I like it.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

No tee-shirt. . . but success none-the-less

I left Fitness Ridge Sunday. I'm grateful, smarter, slimmer, prettier, happier, more hopeful, positive... and still not hungry.
I forfeited my flight from Utah to LA because Bonnie was only one and a half hours away in Las Vegas for her boyfriend, Neal's, birthday. I met her down in LV and we drove to her home together. That was a nice drive... made nicer by my i-pod's 5000+ songs being broadcast through her stereo. I dee-jayed 70's classic rock and other stuff. We had standby tickets for the Ellen show on Monday... but didn't really want to stand in line for 4 hours waiting on a seat that probably wouldn't be available... so walked Hudson, Bonnie' boyfriend's dog instead.

My last week at Fitness Ridge was challenging... but still rewarding. I hiked Monday - Wednesday but my knees really hurt a lot so I didn't hike again after that. They still hurt now but are slowly getting better. I grew weary and jaded with the food most of the last week, but it was still good enough. I think it was just time for me to move on. I did most of the classes but didn't do all of them so no tee-shirt. I feel fine about that. Actually there were people in line for their reward of a tee-shirt whom I know didn't do all the classes.... it's an honor system reward. I just can't work that way, it's got to be real or I just feel like a big liar.
I did go to Bryce Canyon on Saturday with 3 friends and will post pics later. Breathtakingly beautiful place.
I was delighted (X3) when I stepped on the scale Sunday morning to find that I'd lost another 6 lbs on the last week. That is 16 lbs total for me. I said when I went there I'd be happy with any weight loss, but 15 lbs would be awesome. 16 is way awesomer.

It's Wednesday morning and I'm returning to Hong Kong tonight around midnight. I'm happy about that - a lot - but I loved being with Little Miss Sunshine - Bonnie. We had fun. We have eaten out a good bit but it's not hard to choose healthy stuff in LA. In addition to walking the dog for an hour and a half on Monday, I also went with her to Rugby practice. While she coached and harassed the team, I walked around the track 10 times. Hmmm... that was 2 and 1/2 miles.
Only 36 hours and I can see Pat and Zoe :-) . . . . . and Kevin on the weekend. Yay.
I plan on keeping this blog and reporting my weight loss as it continues. I like being accountable.
I'll probably update this entry too later but for now.... it's ending so I can get stuff done.

I learned so many things and here are a few that are on my mind.
1. I don't need snacks. I've always eaten snacks a couple of times a day. They were healthy snacks like almonds, olives, string cheese...etc - BUT I wasn't hungry when I ate them, I was bored. Three good meals a day + a fruit or two is enough for me.
2. My body needs and wants exercise every day. I'm going to honor that. I always played around with it before. I planned it, talked about it, bought supplies. . .etc but in reality didn't exercise really hard. I have a plan now (which I will write down later)
3. Really and Truly, no kidding, I am strong and have an athlete inside of me.
4. I really can lose this weight. I can see it now.
5. I need more water than I thought. They tell you at FR to take your weight and half it. That number in oz. is the amount you should drink every day.
6. People want the best for me. I knew that but when you're overweight you think people are kind of snickering at you. Except for a few really shallow people who I wouldn't waste my time with, that's just not the case.
To be continued. . . .

Thursday, April 16, 2009

BRrrrr...Rrrr.....!

We've had strange weather while I've been here in Ivins, Utah. The 1st week it was SO windy and pretty cool but weather changes quickly here. We've had warm days by the pool and times when you couldn't get your towel fast enough because the air was so cold after getting out of the heated pool.
Today... it snowed while we were hiking. Cool. I hadn't seen snow this year. It's supposed to heat up to 60 tomorrow, 70's he next day and then up to 82 on Sunday - the day I leave.

I did Stop Sign again on Monday. I worked very hard and shaved off another 5 minutes. (why always 5... never 6 or 4?) Yesterday I had a migraine, so slept through 2 classes but it went away last night - Thank God. This morning I did West Canyon again but by the return portion of the hike, my knee pain was almost unbearable. I'm used to that and hope it won't always be the case. Tomorrow I will not hike, I will ride the bike and do the eliptical. Friday I will do Stop Sign for the last time - knees willing. Saturday morning, me and my friends will go to Bryce Canyon and will leave early so we will forgo the Stop Sign hike. I'll time myself on Friday... but really, it doesn't matter if I do or don't do Stop Sign... it's still 500 X more than I was doing in HK.

I have become much more fit and am able to do things I really hadn't thought of. Last week we were doing a class on Cardio machines - I chose the Bike. Usually I don't go over level 4 but I noticed the woman beside me... same size and similar age... was doing level 12. Hmph.... By the middle of that class I was on level 12 and by the end, I was on level 15. (by golly). I'm also pushing the eliptical up to level 8. I was only doing level 1 when I got here. I'm also burning much less calories for the same class now. Stop sign - first day, I burned 1038 cals, now, even though I'm faster by 15 minutes, I burn only about 750-800 cals.... that's life. (that's also 800 more calories than I was burning while watching Oprah in Hong Kong)
Gotta prepare for 2 more full days of exercise. .. . . . . .
Good night! :-)

Monday, April 13, 2009

A very nice weekend


I had a great weekend with Miss Bonnie who came up Friday night. She was a fun little ray of sunshine. :-) She loved the food and thinks the spa is beautiful. I've been here for 3 weeks already so I'm a little tired of it but she kind of renewed me. Thanks Bonnie. (rrr)
Saturday we did the stop sign hike together. (my knees held up, my blisters are healed-ish) I shaved another 5 minutes off my time and she barely got her heart rate up. It was great fun doing that hike with her.
Saturday night we went to a movie. Sunday we went to Zion National Park.... wow! Beautiful! Breathtaking.... awesome... and windy. We went with my friends from Fitness Ridge, Mary, from Alaska and Natalie who lives in Africa. We had a ball. Natalie is pictured below w/ me and Bonnie.I lost 1 pound this past week. I thought it would be more but I'm happy with the total of 10 pounds. (every week is a new math test). I feel great. Every day this past week I walked at least 3 miles a day and exercised all day. No matter what amount of weight I lose while I'm here, the fact is I am in a much better state of mind and health than when I arrived. The numbers will come.

I am starting my last week here. My goal is to walk Stop Sign every day. I will deal with it if I can't do that because of knee problems but that is my goal. I also plan to do every class so I can leave with the prized tee-shirt. I'm eyeing the 'C' schedule and will probably do that this week. There are less people in those classes... so... we'll see.

Mine and Bonnie's feet... mine are more shiny as if I have a heavenly (angelic) aura around me - or perhaps super powers.... but it could just be the sun's reflection.

Friday, April 10, 2009

Whining: The Sequel :-)




Friday morning

Bonnie's coming this afternoon. I'm really excited about that. I'm renting a car for the weekend so we can go out if we want. She will walk the 'Stop Sign' hike with me tomorrow morning. I'm sure the hardest part of that hike for her will be getting up at 7:15 am. (I get up at 6:30... I'm cutting her some slack). I've booked a 'salt glow' massage for her at 6pm tonight after dinner.... I'm having that before I leave next week. They rub you down with mineral salts that exfoliate every bad thing you ever experienced, then you take a shower.... then they give you a massage too. Cool. You're welcome Bonnie.


I'm not hiking this morning. I have an infected blister on my toe. (ain't that elegant?) It hurt more than anything and it scared me yesterday when I realized the seriousness of it; but I've soaked it in Epsom salts several times since then and it's improved tremendously. It's my own fault that it happened and now I've learned a lesson. (another one). I have to wrap up my blisters every morning (they're all mostly healed). It takes me about half an hour to do it -
  • First - get 'mole skin' (soft, chamois-like strips of bandages) and cut it the size you need. Now cut one more just like it.
  • Then cut a hole in it the size of your blister and place it on the area - blister exposed.
  • Get a piece of 'Nu-skin' (squishy gel like square) put it on the exposed blister area.
  • Put the extra mole skin piece on top.
  • Put duct tape over all - one sideways, one lengthwise (for heels - not toes, that's different).
  • Now do this for each blister. I had 4.

The reason my 'big-toe' blister got infected is because I consider it such a hassle to wrap them up each day, I kept the bandages on from 7am until about 3 or 4 when we have our last aerobic class. (so I wouldn't have to wrap them up again) I would wear socks to cover the bandages when doing Yoga. That was stupid, you're supposed to let blisters breathe! I will never be lazy again.

My knees are feeling better but they really hurt when I walk and that's disappointing. I've decided that I have to accept the fact that my knees will hurt this whole 4 weeks. Since I'm at the end of my 3rd week, I think this is an accurate prediction. After I lose more weight, I believe my knees will be better. I've stuck with West Canyon Hike all week. (2 pictures below)I walk 2 hours every morning on this mostly flat or gently inclined hike - but it has really hurt this week. Bummer. But I walk anyway and just concentrate on the music. Funnily enough, after the hike, I return, ice my knees, do yoga and 40 other classes and by the end of the day my knees are almost pain free.... but on the hike - ouch.

It's funny walking around the grounds here and seeing my friends getting smaller and smaller. Usually when you go on vacation - the people you are with do not physically change - but they do here. There are all fitness levels here. 1/3 of the people are pretty fit and come here to keep themselves fit and challenge themselves on advanced hikes and classes I don't even dare to peek at. 1/3 of the people are looking to get into better shape - a tune up sort of. They may have 10 - 15 pounds to lose. Then there's my group... people who need to lose more than 50 pounds (that's a nice way to put it I think). We're the ones with the most noticable physical changes. Everyone is so supportive of each other. We're all each other's mothers and friends. It's nice. When I discovered my blister.. I had several wise people to advise me and their advise has served me well. We laugh our heads off at dinner and there's a chance that we gossip a little now and then. It's like high school in a way. I have several friends who came here the same day as I who are staying 4 weeks also, that's a blessing. Tuesday, one of them told me that I had lost so much weight and that my face was slimmer.....and younger. I was flattered (and elated almost) until I noticed she was eyeing my chocolate covered strawberries. (back off)

Every week new people come in and old people go out. It is hard to see people leave whom I've come to know and enjoy being with BUT it's fabulous when the annoying ones leave after a week. There's one woman here now who is So WHINEY. I think she doesn't realize she's at bootcamp. When I see her I just run. She's very negative and brings people down. Unfortunately she's here another week. . . . . I'm glad she doesn't live in Hong Kong (one whiner there is enough) :-)

I won't get the tee shirt this week because this morning I'm not hiking (or doing the eliptical even). I'll join the other classes today but will skip one class to get Bonnie from the airport. I will get my tee shirt that last week and on this blog will be a picture of me in it.

Monday, April 6, 2009

7+2 = 9 (cool)

Well, I weighed in this morning and lost 7lbs last week. COOL. That makes a total of 9lbs in 2 weeks, just the type of results I'd hoped for. I'm Skinny! (uh, maybe not.... but I'm better off than before).


I also went to the doc yesterday and he said although I am extremely pitiful, I will be alright. He gave me Celebrex (he actually didn't give me anything... the medicine cost an arm and a leg). My leg is better but I will not do the stop sign hike tomorrow, I plan to do West Canyon which is more flat. I hope I can do the Stop sign hike again next Saturday. fingers crossed.
picture to the left: taken at the artists village
Bonnie may be coming next weekend. That means I'll be doing the stop sign hike with her. :-) I'm looking forward to her coming. It'll be fun to do a Circuit class with her.

Today, being Sunday, there is nothing going on here. Not one class although the gym is open. I had a nice relaxing morning then joined some friends by the pool to eat lunch (Mary from Alaska, Dick & Eunice from Delaware) Very nice folks here. Of course today many people left since lots of folks only come for 1 - 2 weeks. It's a great place to be because the people are not here to show off their new work-out clothes or anything like that. People are very supportive - and it surprises you sometimes. When I hurt my leg Thursday, a woman I didn't even know came up to me and hugged me and said she hoped I'd be better soon. (boy did I love that attention), another woman who I had never spoken to before came up to me and offered me a Celebrex. Wow. What kind folks. this is the view outside the front door of Fitness Ridge


This afternoon I went shopping with another friend here and we saw a lot of beautiful western art. It was in a little adobe village surrounded by cactus and lots of dessert bushes (including tumbleweeds) The western art with its liberal use of turquoise, silver, copper and Indian designs reminded me of daddy a lot. While there I saw a beautiful pink cactus. :-) (I didn't even know God made pink cactus!)I had a decaf, skim latte while there. (contraband) It was good. I decided not to have one with caffeine - I'll wait til I get to L.A. I want Bonnie to make me another cup of her good Italian coffee.
I'm hopeful and positive about this week and the bonus is that I'm hopeful and positive while wearing very loose clothes that I'll probably leave behind when I go. :-)

Friday, April 3, 2009

T.G.I.F.

A pretty bird in the dessert.





I think I'm starting to get really tired of this place. The brown bedspreads, the housecoat that doesn't fit right, the soy-based deserts.... blech!, the 18% humidity that makes me itch every day. I miss Pat, Zoe, Kevin, milk and English tea. (and Bonnie but we're almost in the same time zone right now).
Wednesday, I was really on a high. I worked so hard and was so grateful that my knees were getting better. I did the hardest classes. Then yesterday, I did a 101 hike that went all over beautiful red sandstone rocks.
The stick in the middle of this picture is my shadow.
I was doing very well and then started getting competitive (in my mind) and twisted my knee real bad when going up another level of rocks. What a disappointment. I had to have help down the mountain and was just bitterly annoyed that after 2 weeks of fighting knees and blisters... and starting to really feel some improvement, I'm back at square one... walking slow upstairs, doing that BORING stationary bike, making sure not to twist my knee. Man oh Man am I tired of that.
*%$#!^ and #$%*&#@

I'm not hiking today. I want my knees to be good for Stop Sign on Monday.
So, I'm feeling sorry for myself again this morning but I'm only gonna allow it until 10:30 when I go to the gym and exercise with my i-pod. (I LOVE Bonnie's playlist from her songs I got last year)

We have had a LOT of psychological training here.... about eating, exercising, budgeting calories, emotional eating.... etc.. One theme that is carried out over all is the fact that you have to stay POSITIVE. They preach it here and they seem to all live it. (It is the basis for everything)
I feel positive because for the first time since I became really overweight, I want to live a better, more active, fun and healthy life. (well, I always WANTED it, just never actually WORKED at it) I don't want to talk about it, I don't want to read about it or watch shows about it.... I just want to get really fit and live better for the rest of my life.
I won't be doing any more red-rock hikes but I'll be doing the other ones and I will beat my time on Monday. (fingers crossed - dammit)





Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Anastasi Ridge Petroglyphs (and Yoga)
















Tuesday evening 8:45pm
Yoga is really something. Though it's slow and a little dull at times, it stretches the heck out of you and I leave that class every day feeling less pain than when I went in. We do Yoga every day here. (we do everything every day here).
I hiked Anastasi Ridge today (spelling?) It was beautiful. It was mostly uphill (of course) but it wasn't that steep. We saw numerous ancient Indian Petroglyphs. I also met a little dog who wanted to play with me. I loved him. I sure miss Zoe. I took my camera today. :-)




Tonight for desert we had chocolate covered strawberries.... holy cow are they delicious. It's an every Tuesday night thing. Yay! (see picture)


Today I:


Hiked from 8:15 - 10:15 and burned 794 calories on that one hike.
11:15 - Yoga
2:00 - lifted weights
2:30 - cardio Training - hard work but I can do anything for two minutes per machine
3:30 - Cardio Circuit w/ Stretch - really hard running from station to station to work my heart.
4:30 - Stretch class - I'm 3" taller now.


My knees are improving after my nightly soak in Epsom salts and twice daily icing. Hope all this pain ends soon - it's improved tremendously.
Last week at this time I was exhausted - now I feel so much better! I'm surprised at that. Pleasantly. :-)

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Group 'B'

I graduated to Group 'B'. A was easier - B has more cardio. Yikes! Can I do more cardio? Evidently I can. Paige, the Program Director, strongly suggested that I can and she was right - but I am tired.
Today I did the Stop Sign hike.... 4.3 miles. I love writing that - still can't believe I can do that! I taped up my blisters SO Good with New skin, 2nd skin, bandaids and duct tape - one blister (out of 4) did not even pop. That is hilarious. I could feel that the blisters were there but they didn't hurt and didn't get worse, in fact they're healing pretty quickly. My new shoes arrived today (my old ones were the reason for the blisters, the backs were worn through and I didn't realize that when I came here)
I wore a knee brace and although it hurt, it wasn't a bad hurt and didn't really slow me down. In fact, I shaved 5 MINUTES off my time from last week's Stop sign hike (of 4.3 miles). Presently, after soaking in Epsom Salts AND icing my knees, I'm pain free. I'm really grateful about this because I was SO worried last night. This morning I prayed when I got up and apparently someone was listening. :-) I know the pain will be back in the morning after my hike but it's not a bad pain and I feel confident that it will go.
Today I:
Hiked from 8 - 10:30 (according to my monitor I burned 980 cals on that walk)
Did Yoga at 11:15
had lunch then lifted weights at 1:45 until 2:30 when I did
Kickboxing (I LOVE hitting stuff it made me feel great)
Then Cardio Circuit..... boy was I tired then but I burned another 800 cals in these 2 classes.
Then dinner at 5:15 and at 6:15 -
Tai Chi! I'd never done it before, it is hard.
Now at 10pm, I'm hitting the sack.
I cannot express how grateful I am for all the support I'm receiving. Thanks so much to everybody. :-)

Monday, March 30, 2009

One week down - Three to go

I was pretty disappointed this morning to see that I've only lost 2 lbs.... then after thinking about it for a while, I realized I've been dieting for 6 weeks already and have had my big moment of first week weight loss. I'm feeling pretty great except for blisters and knee problem - which is improving.
Lots of people have left and new ones have come in. Some nice folks - they look scared. It's ferociously windy here and sand and dust are flying everywhere. I hope it's better tomorrow morning for the hike.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Saturday..... Ahhh. . . . . . . .

There's only one class on Saturday after the long Stop Sign hike. I didn't hike because I'm healing my blisters and knees BUT I did go into the gym and work for an hour and a half. I worked really hard on the eliptical and the bike + I did half the weight machines. Then, when I was ready to leave . . . the instructor came in to do a Circuit Training class. I knew that I couldn't 'run' from machine to machine or do the treadmill at all cause I was wearing flip flops but I did stay in there and stayed on the eliptical the whole time. I sprinted when she said to and stopped when she said, so I got a whole other work out.
After lunch, me and several other ladies sat around the pool and laughed and talked and some of us slept (not me, I don't sleep in public - really). I'm reading an incredible book called 'Little Heathens' about a woman's experience growing up on an Iowa farm during the depression. It's great!
We had pizza for dinner, it was great. As usual, I couldn't eat it all but I did at least experience hunger for the first time in a week today. (I ate an apple)
Tomorrow morning I will find out how much weight I've lost . . . . looking forward to that.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Blisters

Friday 9:10pm
The picture was taken by the guides. I wasn't that high up (yet) but that is the valley I've hiked into every day. Wow, huh?
Dangit, I have terrible blisters - 4 altogether. My right heel is pretty much a blister. :-( I bought some pretty good bandaids and things at Walmart the other night but I didn't get any antibiotic cream. BUT I just remembered that I have a bottle of pure Lavendar oil and it is GREAT for burns and blisters. I just put some on my blisters and I smell great now. I will not walk tomorrow because I can't with such bad blisters. I'll do the gym stuff Saturday & Sunday but I will do the stop sign hike again on Monday. Fingers crossed.

Today was good. Started out with the hike - beautiful. I did the West Canyon hike again. I'm doing it because it's not so hilly which is good for my knees (which are, unfortunately, in a lot of pain right now). The knee that was operated on ain't bad at all - the other one is hurting a lot. I had to walk slow-ish. I managed to walk for 2 hours and burn 700 something calories. I'm starting to see the reality of 'Boot-camp Spa'. I knew it would hurt but I'd hoped it would be just sore muscles. I didn't think of blisters (which, by the way, takes 15 minutes to wrap up all my blisters properly before any walking - what a pain). I did prepare for the knees and have strong anti-inflammatories. I just hope for the best.

After the hike, I iced my knee for 10 minutes then did a Yoga class. It amazes me how much Yoga relieves all pain. Then we had lunch, a talk on Emotional Eating (which I have never done in my life - I don't know why they even brought it up), then we did a Cardio circuit class. I was dreading it (mostly because I didn't want to put my tennis shoes back on over my blisters) BUT it was pretty neat. You start out on a numbered machine - I chose the bike. You do that for 2 minutes real hard, then run to the weight machine with the next number on it. You life weights for 2 minutes, then run back to the next machine (happened to be a treadmill), then weights, then cardio.... etc.... until you've done about 1/2 of the weight machines and all of the cardio machines twice. It was fun. The music was good. The teacher, Sharon is a lot of fun. She jokes around and runs over to you and increases your speed on your machine. (and there's nothing you can do about it)
After this I swam a tiny bit, then got in the hot tub. Then dinner.
I soaked in Epsom salts a little while ago. I hope it relieves my knee pain and the lavendar heals my blisters because I have never wanted to exercise so badly in all my life!


The food continues to be good (though you can imagine what 30 grams of fiber a day is doing to me). The deserts aren't so great and I'm not wild about the breakfasts... but I'll survive.

I did not get a tee shirt because I missed 2 classes on Wednesday (when I died) but I don't care, I'll get one next week.


It is really breathtakingly beautiful here. There are literally tumbleweeds flying around everywhere. That's so fabulous, I'd never seen that before. When I was pregnant with Kevin I called him tumbleweed because he moved around so much. After seeing them in their natural environment, I know I was right.


But I'm rambling. . . . . . good night.

Friday, March 27, 2009

5-4-3-2-1

Thursday 9:20pm
I learned something new today. Something I didn't know was missing in my life but now that I know about it - I vow to do it once per week..... Interval Training. It's a killer. You get on the torture machine of your choice (I chose the eliptical). The Instructor (Michelle today) stands there with a stop watch. After you're warmed up you exericse as hard as you can for 5 minutes, then when you think you're dead (and didn't make it into heaven), you slow down and work at a resting pace (enough to keep the machine from going into PAUSE) for 5 minutes. Then Michelle yells okay - GO! then for 4 minutes you pedal,step,cycyle or whatever you chose for 4 minutes as hard as you can... then 4 minutes resting work...then just as before you do 3, then 2 then 1... then 30 seconds. Before you know it you are sweaty and have worked about 40 minutes including warm-up and cool-down. I burned 400 calories in that 40 minutes (according to my Polar Heart monitor watch AND the machine)It was really hard and I'm delighted that I could do it. I worked very hard (hence the 400 cals BUT I worked hardest in the last 30 sec... cause I knew it would end)
Yesterday I believe was my 'meltdown day'. I became so exhausted after the hike that I couldn't concentrate or keep myself warm. I skipped 2 classes and slept. Thank God. Now, the next day, I feel great.
Today I:
got up at 6:20 after sleeping 7 and 1/2 hours. (yay!)
8:00am - hiked the West Canyon Hike. Beautiful, not as hard as the stop sign hike but my knees are both acting up. I hiked for 2 hours up and down hills in the most beautiful terrain that God could've thought up. (There will be pictures but I'm trying to get strong before I lug around my heavy camera) OH.... the hiking guides (of which there are MANY) take pictures of us all day while we're not looking. Apparently on Friday night they give each person a DVD of pictures of themselves and the scenery we're in. I know I will probably look like crap in the pictures... but I will have earned it.
10:30am - Yoga. (damn that downward dog pose) It was hard but I think it likes me!(I miss Zoe a lot)
12:00 - lunch, it was yummy as usual, it always is.
1:15 - Cooking demo from the Chef.
2:30 - Interval Training (which I may have mentioned was hard)
3:45 - swimming, then hot tub, then shower
5:00 - Dinner. Salmon pattie burgers & corn on the cob.
6:15 - talk on 'Intuitive eating' by the nutritionist. it was interesting and smart.
7:00 - AMERICAN IDOL.
Tomorrow I look forward to another new hike. It's cool and very windy but that beats hot weather for me anyday. Good night.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Tired beyond belief

6:02 am Wednesday
Uh... well, I did the stop sign hike again and it was much harder Tuesday than Monday but I don't feel any sense of failure because last week, back home, I wasn't walking 4.3 miles. :-) Wow. I walked 4.3 miles again.... can I really do that? uh...yeah.
I started the day out a 6am in the gym, then breakfast, then the hike, Then we had yoga again which I needed, lunch, a cooking demo by the Chef. (the food, I kid you not, is delicious here - we had the BEST chili yesterday then chocolate covered strawberries for desert after dinner... and it was real chocolate too). Then we had a cardio circuit class which was so hard I did not like it at all. Really hard. We had 4 cardio stations set up in a room (steps, kickboxing, spin-cycling and the exercise ball). The teacher timed us and we'd work on one of the stations for 4 minutes.... real hard. Then we'd work harder the last minute and when the clock went off we'd run like happy fools to the next station to do it all again. I chose the step first.... I don't like the step. She said she had a surprise for us at the end of class. (I hate teacher surprises) It was a jog around the pool. I was very happy to see that I can run. My knee is really holding up well. :-)
Then we had a pool class. It was cool outside (50 maybe) but the pool's heated. I loved the water but I think the exhaustion of the day was just making my cough worse cause I kept having to stop. I also can't lift my right shoulder because I slept wrong on the plane and it's hurt since...... so after dinner, I had a massage with a woman (Sheila) who really knows what to do with stressed out bodies.
I slept from 10 - 4:30 and got up at 5:45. I'll be heading down to breakfast at 7 but am feeling upbeat right now.
Yesterday on the hike - it was strange that it was so much more difficult than the day before. I insisted on reaching the top though... even though I stopped several times and was a quivering bowl of self pity after about an hour. (thank God I was alone). Then when I reached some of the most difficult part, .6 miles before the finish but still uphill, I ran into a nice young man from the spa who I've become friends with. He's just out of grad school and is here for 3 months to lose weight, get fit and create a better life for himself. He was also exhausted and didn't want to go on. The van pulled up to see if we wanted to go back. He decided to walk with me to the top and I was so happy that I inspired him to keep going. (I don't usually inspire people to keep exercising - I usually inspire them to drink more coffee and stuff like that). Everyone here (except for the lady with the red hair) is inspiring for each other and it's a very caring, positive atmosphere. I felt so good being someone's inspiration. He told me he wouldn't have continued if it hadn't been for me. dah dah dah dada dah da da dah dah.. (the theme from Rocky) Cool.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Duct tape - not just for rednecks

4:57am
Guess what protects your feet from blisters. . . . Yep, good ol duct tape. I don't have blisters yet but have potential blisters so they gave me a little bit of duct tape wrapped around a pencil to use as needed. You just tear off a little and put it directly on the blister. The socks then rub the duct tape but not your skin.....

This bootcamp experience is just what I needed - though I was not happy about being here while hiking yesterday morning in a COLD, windy area. It was hard and Man was I totally exhausted. Partly from jetlag though. I've slept 7 and a half hours last night so I'll be better today. The hike was in Snow Canyon National Park and it's referred to as the 'stop sign hike'. They photographed me at the top and I could not help but kiss the stop sign when I arrived. I'm impressed that I did it cause you KNOW I wanted to turn around. My Polar heart monitor said that I burned 1068 calories just on that hike.....wow. That's a nice little boost. The last mile of it was all uphill. Before that stretch, it had been up and down not just up. It really was my limit but I think it was extra hard because of my chest infection. But the infection is getting better and better. The scenery is indescribable. (I'll have pics later)


I'm very happy I'm here and so far so good. Yesterday after that 4.3 mile stop sign hike, I also did a Yoga class and a kickboxing class. My body is hurting somewhat 'normally'. My knee is feeling great. so happy about that!

They are actually taking pictures of us and will give us a CD at the end of the week with our pics set to music. That's nice.


The food is very good and I cannot even eat all that they give us. It's 1200 calories per day, non dairy and no cafeine. I did bring some Marks & Spencer's tea bags and had 1/4 cup of tea in my room yesteday... not so good without milk. I have no giult about this, I don't plan on giving up coffee/cafeine altogether. After a few days I will most likely not have any more cafeine at all. I want to see if there's a difference. So far, still not hungry.
Yesterday we did a couple of workshops about budgeting calories, learning how to calculate input X output, minus this and that to let us know how much we burn and how fast and all that... It was interesting though it kinda resembled a math class at first.
Today my schedule says I will:
6am - Open gym (I'll lift weights and do the eliptical probably) the list says optional but we know it ain't.
7am - breakfast
8am hike - I'll probably do the stop sign again.

10:30 am - Stretch

11:15am - Pool or Yoga

12:15 - Lunch

1:15 - Cooking demo. The chef is from Wolfgang Puck's - it shows.

1:45 - Open Gym

2:30 - Cardio Circuit (yesterday I accidently did the kickboxing instead of this)

3:30 - Pool

5:00 - Dinner

6:15 - Workshop: Spending your calories Wisely Part 2.

7pm - slither back to my room, take a bath and watch Dr. Phil at 8 :-) then answer e-mails, read, then to sleep by 9:30 latest.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Boot Camp Spa - Day One


4:17am - Utah
Hello Fitness Ridge! (picture is the view from my window)
After a pleasantly bumpy but beautiful flight, I landed in a beautiful area that is surrounded with majestic red mountains. Wow! The landing was a surprise because we flew into what seemed like an alley created by beautiful ridges - Green on one side, brownish- red on the other. It was a small plane with propellers..... I like bumpy rides.

I met my first friend, Sue, as we waited by the curb for the van to collect us. It's a brisk and cool 40-50 something degrees. Nice. The high for most of this week will be 50 something. I can live with that.

After a weigh-in and measurement session, we met (one-on-one) with a very tall lady, an exercise person (tech name, I forget at 4 am) We discussed what kind of exercise I usually do (I walk Zoe up a steep hill regularly and do Pilates 1 -X per week) and then she assigned me to a group. I'm in Sue's group. She's from Chicago and she laughs at all my jokes. We will get along great! Each person gets a schedule of what they're supposed to do. I looked at it and I will literally be exercising all day. If I keep to the schedule they've given me, I'll get a tee shirt at the end of the week (I want that tee shirt) If I don't keep to the schedule, Danae says they will 'KNOW it' (just like Santa knows when you're bad) and will find you.

Then we went to dinner. Wow! It was fabulous! It started w/ us getting our own salad. Then they gave us a huge bowl of whole wheat pasta with fresh vegetables, turkey (ground) and many interesting spices. I couldn't eat it all and now at 4 am, I'm still not hungry. Afterwards we had a little serving of chocolate pudding made with soy milk (I guess) and graham cracker crumbs. It was okay but not really my cup of tea. We then remained seated while every single diner (about 55) stood up, said where they're from and what brought them there.

"My name is Becky. I'm originally from SC but have lived in Asia for many years. I'm here for a month. I want to kick-start weight loss for myself and also I'd like to see exactly what I'm capable of where exercise is concerned. I'd like to learn more about what I should be doing, and I thought I could learn all that here."

What I didn't tell them - my father passed away last July and in his will, he left money for me and my 3 sisters. After debating on how I should use it in a way that would honor him and his gift, I decided that working on improving my life by learning to care for myself better - which would impact my next 50 years (I'm 48.8)...... would make him happy. He wanted me to be happy - that I know. I had a daddy moment at the airport when I was at the baggage carousel. I've never cried at the baggage carousel before... and I managed to escape tears then, but I'm certainly having a daddy moment now.
I also didn't tell them that I have been working hard at losing weight for a couple of months and have gotten to a place psychologically where I'm ready to not be fat anymore. I, for the first time in my life, I don't feel like going into the intricate details of the misery that extra weight brings..... I just want to get rid of it. I've been through a lot of sad times in the past year (08 sucked) and it has made me learn so much while experiencing one epiphany after another. I'm so intent on losing weight and feel so different from the past. The funniest thing is that in my mind, I'm not seeing myself as fat anymore. That is new and a major deal I think. The other funny thing is that I walk around now, not feeling fat, or ashamed... then I catch a glimpse of myself in a mirror or a reflection and I'm startled to find that "Damn! I'm still fat"....
Soon my vision in my mind is what will be reflected in windows, mirrors and my shadow on the street. :-)

After dinner and orientation (by Danae, who after hearing us speak, went around the room and named EACH PERSON THERE OFF THE TOP OF HER HEAD!) I hope she got that brain power from eating the food here. Then Sue and I went to the FR shop and bought a Polar heart rate monitor so we really will work hard and efficiently, + blister-proof socks and I also bought a 'camel back' backpack which holds 1.5 litres of water. That'll see me through the daily hikes here, I'm sure.

Today (in 45 minutes) I will do this:
6am - Intro to Circuit
7am -breakfast
8am - hike
10:30am - stretch
11:15am - Pool or Yogalates
12:15 - lunch
1:15 Budget lecture (budgeting calories)
1:45 - open gym
2:30 - Circuit training
3:30 - Budget workshop
5:00 - Dinner
6:15 - Tai chi or lecture 'Spending your choices wisely'
7:00 - multiple choice: commit suicide, homicide, wonder what the hell I came here for, take a hot bath and sleep with or without the aid of sleeping pills.

I'm a little run down because I developed chest infection right before leaving HK but I'm taking antibiotics and have some things to aid me. . . . . I have lots of support from friends all over and family... and my husband back home in Hong Kong.
We'll see.
:-)